Reacting…

Well, let me set this straight. I was not pmsing for no reason. Now that I have said that…

I realized this morning that I was still mad about Friday. And I started asking all these questions, which in the end, he answered.

And I saw him today at work. I was with my sister. And he was working with his coworkers. And after he directed me to the section I needed to look at, he said he would be back and sat back down and continued working, laughing with his coworker.

So fuck it, I sat in front of him, waited for the damn coworker to leave, and started asking my questions from that morning, which he answered with no problems. Really fine there. And then when another coworker started walking up to the table and he said he would be back, but I asked if I should just go. And he said yeah.

So we shook hands. And my sister asked if he was going to kiss me. And he looked at me, we made eye contact (I think) and he said no. So we left. And I was feeling okay, until I realized a few minutes later, that I didn’t like how he didn;t kiss me.

And I texted him asking why he didn’t. And he called me instead of answering to say hi, perhaps to hear if there was sadness in my voice. I texted him about it. And he said he could ask me the same question of why I didn;t kiss him. So I asked him again. About initially walking away, then not kissing me later, he didn’t answer. HAnd when I got home, I messaged him about it again. And he gave a thumbs up. What the hell?

He said I was acting crazy. And that he needed me to calm down.

But in truth, I’m upset. What the fuck? He’s being a jerk right now. He didn’t stay with me on Friday. And he didn’t really want to talk to me at work. And he didn’t choose to kiss me when I left. Is he fucking off? Is he embarrassed of me?

Maybe I am acting crazy, but he’s being a fucking jerk. And I’m angry about everything. About Friday and today. It makes me feel really sad and upset about him. He’s just fucking up left and right. And I get that I’m being overly sensitive and emotional because I’m on my period right now, but he’s not acting right.

Ha! About half an hour ago, I asked him to just talk to me right now.

I don’t think I actually want to talk to him though. I’m mad. And if I talk while I’m mad, it doesn’t end well. And he’s probably irritated because I keep yelling at him, so I’m just going to let this rest for now. When we talk again, he’s going to have to explain himself because he has to.

Other than that, I know I love him a lot, but I just don’t feel too confident in him right now. I know in the end, we work out. Because in the end, we always do. And I know that I am overreacting and acting crazy. And I know he’s being an insensitive asshole.

This moment will pass. Come tomorrow or at most, Tuesday, we make up. For now though, I will spend my time cooling down.

Also, this motherfucker keeps messaging back thumbs up signs. Whatever though, I found a thumbs down sign. Yeah, I had to look for it too. I find it funny.

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