Study, study, study.
That’s all you’ve really been doing today.
And sometimes you find yourself sitting here, studying, comparing yourself to those other girls, especially that girl S. And that, that is a pain in the fucking ass.
So you’re just trying to focus on you and bettering you in the areas you need to focus on.
A flower doesn’t think of competing with the flower next to it. It just blooms.
On other notes, you are not sure what he meant when he said to leave him alone. Did he mean to never speak to him again, it’s ‘over over’. Or if he just meant he wanted to be left alone for the moment. But if he did mean ‘over over’, he’d have said it. That’s why you told him that you were assuming he just meant for the moment, like this break in general, not forever.
Fuck it though. Live as if you already took that one step ahead without him, as if you already left. He’ll fall behind or he’ll catch up. So it’s whatever. Just focus on you now.