Two Months: Day 12, part 3

And now you went to check his tumblr, and he changed his password. And it feels like the walls are caving in and that he’s hiding things and that all the locks have been changed.

And you’re typing like mad because it’s all fucking driving you crazy. And although, you’re face is fine outside, you feel so sad and manic inside.

And you hate this, you hate this, you hate this.

What the fuck is he doing? What the fuck is he doing?

Changing all the locks and shit. You hate this, you hate this, you hate this.

You don’t even want to think about him anymore. You don’t.

Why the fuck are you even in this break that you proposed? Why in the fuck?

You’re so mad, you’re so mad, you’re so mad.

And even though you’re falling apart right now, you’re wondering if he’s okay. What in the fuck? What in the fuck?

And you asked him what he was doing right now. Ugggggh, you’re sad, and mad, but you miss him. You miss him.

And you hate him. And you love him. And you want to shake him. And you want to indulge at the thought of loving him, but you don’t want to think about him.

And you’re sitting here wondering if he’ll say something to you or just ignore you. Damn you for putting yourself out there yet again. You’re so stupid. And you want to cry. You want to cry, but be strong, be strong.

You hate this, you hate this, you hate this.

Stop.

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